Poems Discovered From My Deothang Diary: Nature, Sex and Loneliness

1
Sky frozen
all around life shivers:
autumn gloom

2
The narrow path teems
with creepers both sides waving-
trees grow

3
Smiling women
too conspiring to understand-
alien tongue

4
There is no tree
over the mountain
I rest under the shade
of a wandering cloud

5
Celebrating
in the guttural grave
shadow's bodiness

6
Meeting at night
she chuckles and looks
a witch

7
Reconcile
inner jerks in the train
homeward

8
Near the railway track
she squats with hand on the knees
and hides her parts
in half-dark the naked truth
transforms nature into nude

9
In the cathedral of night
over-run by sex-bugs
he's turned a zombie
to write verse with one hand
and rub flesh with the other

10
Tongue of death
in my temple
flagellation of Christ-
nudes couple in the mind
Titan, Renoir, Francesca
Botticelli and all

11
Falling shadows mock
my impotence, curse me
for standing alone
like a Christ on the pavement
begging for crucifixion

12
Man is an animal
with a peculiar smell
thought Bertolt Brecht
she says she hates the smell
I know man as man
is hardly seen

13
Severed from the tree
he sways like a leaf kicked
by storm in a forest
wanders alone to create
meaningful poetry
parallel to freedom
to end despotism
of the New Right

14
Civilization hasn't spared the caves
man suffers in the hands of parasites
here too those who work often go without food

15
One upon the other
hollow mounts
crack and shatter
on the aged paths
stray dogs bark
who cares whether
we breathe fog or air
where we embark
only shades prevail

16
Who's there that doesn't drink
the cocktail of sin and repentance
trumpets don't awake
the blind saint and angel
inveigled into sin
I await my turn
to enter the lake of fire

17
While I sit still
how my shadow moves-
the little flame of candle
tossing against the wind
or wheedling passion nestles
in the grey of mound

18
Stands a lone tree
in the wild wind and rain
hoping miracle

19
Float over the hill
the autumn circles of smoke-
her long hair streaming

20
A lively darkness
of moistened cavern-
her mysterious hole

21
In labour's colony
she is coupled
whole night and gets
abused and flogged
in the morning
lover turns ruffian
on blue black sheet
stains dry up by
the body's heat

22
Images cry out
from the broken mirror
sounds invade
in the evening before
the drink is freshened
I turn a bohemian

23
There he sits downcast
unaware of tomorrow
or where he'll go
here they carouse and sing
affirming the callous
way of the world

24
Sex-torn women
half-live with murdered desires
weaving dreams of flesh
in Deothang their fingers lean
on looms with newer tales

25
He looks intently and chews
her flesh before she feels
the oily warmth and bursts
her naked anger he fails
to do down in the bamboo rustles
the rock slips and he balls up
his own tangled game

26
The wine of love swells
in my vessel dark shadows
recede human dirt
between sound and silence greets
the joy and bliss of spirit

27
When I see your wet beauty
your body after the bath
when you wring out your saree
you twist my heart
I yen to enfold you back
in my ribs, I envy god

28
Darkness overwhelms
desires don't let me sleep:
sin of solitude

29
I open the window
of my new house and count
small houses in the valley
mules and horses graze
without a shepherd
the wind howls and the sun is down
the curves all around invisible
in the widening dark twinkles
the top of the house of god

30
Journeying I have seen the pale shades of life
hollow faces of men, women and children and met
many an oral sympathizer who talk
and praise before me and abuse behind
I've seen so much of their epileptic love and known
so much of their tricks I'm tired of my friends
in this market everyone is cheating and trying to get all giving nothing
here I see the empty barrels scattered
the pox of the land
I see the fools flourishing and the righteous suffering
I see the beasts moving in the lungs of India
stained by the blackness of birth
the noble and the simple uproot
in the dark star of the twilight spirit is poisoned
and despair has led millions to dig the earth
what treasure is hidden in the grave of man
I see many with eyes shut and heads cocked towards the sky but wonder
what candle of prayer they kindle
what fire they consume by the breath of their nostrils
what image they see what voice they hear
what dwells in their houses of clay
in the bulging belly of the earth I feel
the hidden pain of humanity
marooned in the web of the hypocrites here
the pillars of society suck the blood of man
and the swine makes the land desolate
I know what flame is spread out
man survives on the rubbish of ages
and sheathing leaves cover the graveyard I see
the sepulchral sadness in every home
man has lost his coat
deception shines in every eye and every institution seems a hoax
the dodging crowd on the road and the growling of the traffic upsets
the order and a wind of distrust blows all around
human relation is reduced to mere fear and passion
and humanity is bearing the burns of acid
scars crown every head I see
man raping himself
I go by him and he does not see
I shake his hand and he does not feel
I speak and he does not hear
my fellow brother does not feel my existence
my own soul abhors my body
my body doesn't know my soul
here light is darkness
here life is dried
like the eagle time hastes to the prey
I cry but no one hears
 
 
 
 

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